Tuesday, April 13, 2010

I guess I’ll go eat worms

First, the winner of The Sheet Boutique giveaway is Allison from Princess Mommy of 2! And the winner of the $50 HomeGoods gift card is #92, Red Door Home. (Check out her Before and After here. Wowza!) Ladies, please email me!

Well, back in September, I shared all I knew about blogging. I know I’ve been promising a sequel to that post, but I quickly realized a follow up post about blogging would be about 15 miles long! So I figured I’d break it up a bit.

Today’s topic? It’s a biggie. Wait for it…

Not everyone likes my blog.

What the what?! Who the who?? I KNOW.  ;)

I got my first negative comment almost a year into blogging. I was reading merrily along through my comments and there it was. It felt like a punch in the gut. I’d seen negative comments on other blogs here and there, but until I got one myself, I never realized how much it would hurt.

It doesn’t matter who you are, what you do, how you write, what your house looks like, someone -- many someones – will not like you. I’ve mentioned before that I make a point not to discuss anything controversial on my blog – I want it to be fun, laid back and relaxing for all.

But it doesn’t matter if you just talk about rainbows and pink sunsets every day – people won’t like you and they will tell you.

They won’t like that you decorate above your cabinets.

They won’t like a paint color you used.

They won’t like that you say “lurve” or “cauuute.”

They won’t like that you advertise on your blog.

They won’t like that you are happy.

They won’t like that you don’t spend every waking moment interacting with your children.

They won’t like you because they wish they’d thought of that!

They won’t like you because you use too many :)’s and a lot of !!!!!!!

They won’t like you because even though you really, really, really want to, you just don’t have enough time in the day to visit their blog.

They won’t like you because you have more time, resources, followers, hits, subscribers…on and on and on.

I’m going to be completely, brutally honest and say I have felt these feelings at one time or another when reading various blogs over the years. It's just human nature. Most of the time it’s that little green monster called Envy that rears it’s ugly head in my head.

It takes a lot of maturity and restraint to not comment and just shrug, get past whatever is bothering us and move on. Change the channel you could say. But I think in the end you can’t go wrong by doing that. For the life of me, I will never understand why someone would be blatantly mean…just to be mean.

I think I’ve stuck up for a blogger a time or two when they’ve received a nasty comment, and it may have come across as mean. But I probably meant it as mean. (Nah nah, they started it!!) So there. you. go.

See? Mature is my middle name.

There is a difference, of course, between constructive criticism and a nasty comment. And we need to remember that the written word is very easily misunderstood. Often someone is just trying give advice and it can come across wrong when written.

But then there are those who are mean and nasty and downright awful and there’s no mistaking it.  ;)

I’ve learned the only thing you can control when you get a comment like this is your reaction. When I get one, it takes my breath away for a minute. Then, I stew for a few more minutes. I’ll call my hubby, tell him what they said, he’ll tell me he loves me. (Much better.)

I’ll stew a little bit more. Maybe call a friend. (Feeling even better.) Then I’ll look at my son’s face and say to myself -- “Making this kiddo happy is all that matters in my whole world.”

Then I’m done. It doesn’t take long. The process takes less and less time with every comment I get.

I know it hurts. Most don’t realize how much it hurts until they get one themselves. Bloggers share much of their world with readers and when one person comments on how much they hate it, it stings.

But in the scheme of things, those comments should not take up any of your life, your head, your heart.

Call a friend. Shrug it off. Let it go.

And maybe add a big. fat. ppppppbbbbbhhhhhhtttttt…

It will make you feel better. Promise.

:)     :)     :)      :)    !!!!!!!!!  !! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

P.S. I’ll explain more of how I hung the airplane art with the acrylic over it in my next post!

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